read biblical stories as a child
waiting for my
vision to appear from the dirt
to tell me
how things were going to be

pored over pages of hope and joy
looked into the eyes of adults
to search for
the saviour who
did not come

do I need to know
why and
how I internalised
the shame of being,
so young?

was it a
single word, or
repetitive injuries to
my little ego?

I do not know,
cannot remember
or will not remember

my little ego,
is still in there
wounded and so
desperate for
something she just


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