i love you so much
you are so special
i have never felt this before
you make me feel
you have taught me how to feel
(no words, silence at 4am, staring at the ceiling while a man sleeps)
i am so sorry
i’m sorry
but i know i won’t hurt you again
i would never hurt you
you have to trust me
you can trust me
why do you hate men
you read too many books
that’s not fair
(no words, silence as a chest repeatedly slams into my face)
i promise this won’t happen again
i don’t know why i did it
you’re so amazing
you’re strong
i didn’t mean to
i love you so much
wow you’re so sexy
you’re strong
i’m not a rapist
i would never do that
how could anyone do that
you made me feel like i’m a rapist when you told me to stop
i would never do that to you
(no words, silence as my head is pushed downwards)
i’m sorry i pushed you
i’m sorry i did that
i don’t know why
i don’t know why
i don’t know why

they never know why
none of them ever fucking know why